As of this post, there is still inches of snow in my yard and a forecast for flurries and freezing temperatures. Thoughts of going out in the yard and screaming to the sky, “Snow, snow, go away come again, next winter!”
This year has been as unpredictable work wise as it has weather. Work on the illustrations of my first picture book is nonexistent to the eye. Only two pages are complete. Difficult decisions on chopping up the story into illustrations haven’t all been made. Doubt and questioning myself has stopped my hand from touching paint to paper more times than I care to admit.
Every week, I find myself saying, next week. Then next week. I am tired of winter and ready for that change in routine that warmer temperatures brings. Ready to finish this picture book, and ready for winter to go away.
Truth. I had set my deadline, and then tried to push myself to complete the book.
Truth. I do not work well on a deadline,whether set by others or myself. I am and have always been someone who does their best work meandering.
Truth. I have never accepted that about myself. It is time.
Hi, my name is Julie and I am a meandering genius. I have gotten in my own way because I do not account for this aspect of my personality. I plan and schedule according to a fictitious ‘norm’ of super woman imagery which leads to rebellious procrastination and a forced drive that makes me do less than my best to ‘git er done’.
The picture book will be out in July or October. That is reasonable, allowing for the time and creativity that will make both myself and my grandchild happy. So there it is.
Push or Piddle?
If piddling is good enough for winter and spring, then it is good enough for me. Things come in the right time. Weather, seasons, and creativity aren’t exactly the same, but I think the analogy is sound. They are all about growth.
Plants need the various stages that the seasons bring in order to grow and multiply. So does creativity. In the winter of my work, looking forward to spring and sprouting of ideas.
What are you planting?